My head is filled with quotes and sayings. Most of them I find useful to recall in times of emotion. A recentering force. It’s not as easy to calm ourselves down or decipher our feelings. The help of other humans, minds that have entered the space before, can be a saving grace.
After a weekend of aggressive partying and drinking, feeling like absolute shit after is natural. My body did not respond well to it though. It tells me I’m depressed. It tells me there is no meaning and summons the question what am I doing. What do I do next.
Then my mind summons a message. There are no highs without the lows. This is not a message I created myself. Someone else who has been through the experience before let me know what to expect.
I had some of the most fun of my life that weekend with friends making memories I’ll never forget. Saying nothing but it meaning everything. Sharing stories, drinks, laughs, dreams, and memories. Being so close. A rollercoaster of love, feeling accepting, and accepting others for exactly who they are. Every flaw and redeeming quality. It doesn’t matter. We were all in it together, making the most of the absurdity that is life.
Then came the low. Knowing the fun was over. Having no one to talk to. Not feeling the loving warmth of those around you and enjoying the presence of other humans' energy. A lack of food and water in my system. Drinking is just borrowing happiness from tomorrow. I’d argue hanging with friends is what really takes away from tomorrow. Loneliness can be worse than a hangover.
Being so close and connected to other people is such a blessing, but can also be a curse. We forget how to be alone. Life, after all, is a single player game. When it comes to happiness though, it is anything but. A nice sunset enjoyed with a close friend is more fulfilling than one alone. Sharing experiences and the world with other people, especially ones you love, makes it all the better.
Anyways, I’ve noticed that a lot of where life exists is in the large contrasts. Life doesn’t exist in the middle. Well it exists, but there isn’t much to it. People working tedious unfulfilling jobs, going home, watching tv, repetitive things. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this. Just not much happens. Then on one end, we have the high achievers. People obsessed with progression of themselves and the world. They care about money, power, and influence. They alter society's path and dictate the direction of our made up little game. On the other end we have people obsessed with experiences and living in the moment. Looking for that next thrill. Artists, Athletes, Druggies, Musicians. They want to get the most out of life and the moment. Long term thinkers, short term thinkers, and people who don’t think much at all.
Life exists in the contrasts.
There is big money to be made in the contrasts. High risk, high reward. Low risk, low reward. Out of the money options can hit big for you. Bonds can win slowly for you.
Risk vs. Reward is one of the main contrasts we all deal with on a daily basis.
Climb a treacherous mountain. Risk your life, but the reward is the feeling of immense accomplishment and a worthwhile memory.
Open up to your friends or lover and risk being distanced from. The reward could be they fully accept you for who you are and you can be completely yourself.
Make a piece of art and you run the risk of being ridiculed and called silly. The reward could be resonating with people and helping them see the world through a new lens.
Reward in life does not come without risks.
Life exists in the contrasts.
Fear is a constant in life. We are scared of any change out of our ordinary environment. This is our biology’s way of saying play it safe. Take care of yourself. Do what I want you to do and let fear stop you from the rest.
Fear is going a different route down a ski mountain that you’ve never been to before. Fear is getting up in front of a crowd of people to talk about your ideas. Fear is the protector of failure. If you never do anything you fear, you will never fail.
If you never fail, you will never know what you are truly capable of.
Life exists in the contrasts.
I’m not advising you to choose a specific path. Just be aware. The highs and lows of life exist in the contrasts. If you want to feel deeply, it’s time to start searching there.